Multiconstruct

After Amee and I split up I went to camp alone in the desert for some weeks. It was January so I went to the Anza Borrego desert in San Diego county. Very stark and beautiful and cold at night. The nights are long in January, so  i spent a lot of time shivering in my tent thinking, reading by candlelight, and a little writing. So this would have been written in January 2002, and less a dark night of the soul then a time to really reflect on my purpose in the world. i got some good answers and it was time well spent. Anyone who comments on this post i will give a copy of my book “America: Its Land and Its People”. (Facebook comments don’t count, they have no history.)

I need to get real with people

Its easiest to do with strangers

With no history

Preconceived conceptions

Or formulaic patterns

To escape reality.

The fascination of discovery

Wonder

Total attention

The Universe condensed

To an understandable packet.

The most beautiful times

Are when that packet

Is the interaction.

The unity of two

The most difficult

To harmonize into the One.

As zero is nonbeing

And one is existance

Than two is one and not one.

Duality, the first separation

But between two is the

First Possibility of communication

A process that is One.

But if only one is being one

There is no communication

Only projections

Of the not one received by the one

And the Universe is the Other

And i am no more

Lost and forgotten

By even myself

I wander not in the unity of the One

Where I belong

Where I am nurtured

Where i am inexplicably me.

But in the Zero

Oblivion

Nothingness

The abyss

So excuse me

If I try

To make you get real

With me

I am only trying to exist.