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whats up

I was scanning the archive list and saw i’ve hit every month since i started. It seems like i’ve hardly put up anything when i think of all the things i’d like to say but haven’t. I did some editing on going crazy part 6, strengthening the ending mostly. I haven’t gotten a lot of comments on the series and i know it makes some people uncomfortable. It is a story i like to tell though. The most transformative time of my life and i’ve lived in continuous transition. I only settle down now as constant transition is static. I have been blessed to see significane and meaning in what i do pretty universally. Sometimes in the moment i lose that, working for dr tod and with cortez i felt that way, also as a case manager for folks with developmental disabilities. But even in those eras, for me a year or two in more objective time i had these tremendous moments; the call from guy whose color blindness was cured by cannabis, mastering batterer intervention, teaching a sociopath to feel, getting an agoraphobic out of the house after 3 years so she could go to her son’s graduation, doing cutting edge stuff with autism. But mostly i allowed the routine of it all to override the joy. Mostly because intensity has its costs. These days, this era, I am more intense. I am more conscious of what i have learned and what i am doing. I am more engaged less detached and more heavily invested. Not bound but tied certainly.

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